You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Even my vagina gasped.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.