How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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