No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I am mentally ready for anal.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
