You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I need a beard to bite.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize