No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
My day in three words: secret purse cake
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
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