yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
