I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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