Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

a queef is a wish your heart makes.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?

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(720): View more from Colorado

i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.

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(845): View more from New York

Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine

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(209): View more from California

I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird

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(337): View more from Louisiana

You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco

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(443): View more from Maryland

Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.

(410): View more from Maryland

Youre asking too much from me

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