She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
