I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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