he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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