ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
