yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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