My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize