this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
