if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize