Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize