she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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