You really coming over, don't trick.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
