I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
