The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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