I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
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You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
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I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.