The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.