I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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