Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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