i always forget guys have bellybuttons
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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