Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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