You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
