Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
This beer is not sobering me up at all
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
