Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize