I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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