Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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