The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
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