idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
