Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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