dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
