yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
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He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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