It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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