How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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