and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
foreskin is a definite game changer
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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