College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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