why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
