Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
