Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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