I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
40s are totally the cure
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize