It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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