So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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