chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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