Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize