It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
