hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
