I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize
